Catholic state of mind?

To be honest, I did nothing today. It was great. I sat around and read, after sleeping most of the day. Last night I took my first birth control pill. I'm excited and scared about that. Excited because I want to be regulated, and because I don't want any tiny thibodauxs crawling around. Scared because... well scared isn't the right word. I just feel anxious I guess. I feel like this is the hormonal balance I was born with. I don't want to add or subtract any hormones and change my natural body balance. I feel like I might be messing with destiny? Like the butterfly theory. If I'm supposed to get pregnant but can't because I'm avoiding it will I have a different baby then one I was destined to have when ever that time comes? Was I destined to have one soon but now won't have one until we decide we are ready? Then again, was I destined to decide to take the pill? Conundrum.

Thats whats going on in my mind... ANYWAYS. I took my first pill last night, and forgot tonight. So I took it an hour later. I don' think that will make much of a difference unless I do that all the time. I wish I had work, I need money. On the plus side though, I'm off for tomorrow so I get to go to Janey's wedding. I'm happy for that. I wish I could afford to get them a present now, but I told her and she gets it, they will get one later on. Probably when they get to live together and it will be wedding/housewarming. There really isn't much else to say except that I can't believe Kameron will be two on the first. :( He's so big now. I could cry just thinking about it. Last thing on today's list of events is that I let raylen paint my fingernails and harley paint my tonails. they very much enjoyed that, and it doesn't look that awful- lol. Its clear with glitter. I guess it would be kind of hard to fudge that up. Love them SO.MUCH. Later babies.