Guess Who, Giggles, the Royal Wedding, and Lots of Pain

We went to church today again. Thats two whole weeks in a row. Go us. Jackie also came down yesterday and stayed the night with me so she could come to church with us today. It was nice, even though we only got four hours of sleep.We stayed up till five thirty playing Guess Who and giggling. Church was also very nice, even though I was sleepy. I feel content when I'm there. Lately I've felt so stressed, and bad, and almost actually depressed. Its nice to not even think about anything else than how much some one loves me. Yes, I mean Jesus, no, I'm not going to get preachy on you. Tony and Kandace were there today! I love spending any time I can get with them. They remind me of who I used to be. They remember me like that I think. They're like my big brother and sister. I love them so much. It helps that they love me too. They always want to know how I am and whats going on in my life, and about all my plans. So I spent a long time talking about our wedding plans with them today. :) I've also set up our counseling session with Tony. I can't wait to have that talk with Jeffrey and Tony. I want to connect with Jeffrey on that level. I think Tony will be a good liason for that. I'm also very excited about weddings in general today. I talked about it with Tony and Kandace this morning (who seem just as excited as me) and then mom and I watched all kinds of royal wedding things all day on t.v. I'm SOO excited for the royal wedding. I'm trying to decide which channel I should watch it from. There are so many choices!! I absolutely can NOT wait to see her dress. Its like a real life fairytale, and I feel like I know them! I'm not dillusional and believe that I do or anything, but I'm excited that I'm old enough and aware enough to be apart of this moment in history. Jeffrey isn't as enthusiastic and is pretty upset that his whole friday is planned around the celebrations! lol. Anyways... I'm SOOO sore. My right shoulder has been KILLING me for the past two weeks for some mysterious reason. It totally doesn't help that yesterday while I was waiting for Jackie to come I was cleaning and I fell down the stairs, which freaking hurt! When I fell I broke a glass and gashed my right hand ring finger which nearly bled me to death. Then I went outside to get mom's chemicals from her truck and the wind blew the umbrella and it's stand down and it cut my leg! After that I went upstaris to make my bed and I broke my freaking nail! I got beat up yesterday! :( Today I cut my foot open on the side of my bed. I just need to sleep for a few days and try life again later. I'm off to watch more royal wedding things babies!

Day five

My favorite quote.

This has always been so comforting to me.

Growing up is never straightforward. There are moments when everything is fine, and other moments where you realize that there are certain memories that you’ll never get back and certain people that are going to change. And the hardest part is knowing that there is nothing you can do except watch them.

I like not being a double zero in jeans unnaturally; skeletons just aren’t my thing. So what if I jiggle a bit, confidence will give me all the happiness I need. It’s okay if I’m not the hottest girl around, as long as I have a decent personality, I’ll be fine. I’ve lived, I’ve laughed, I’ve loved. Maybe not in the ways people would appreciate, but it’s been more than enough for me.

I have always had this tendency to assume that change, when it happens, can only be for the worse you know? And lately, I kinda feel like that's not true. Like, whatever's waiting for me out there may not be that bad.

I believe in karma. what you give is what you get. i think you can't appreciate real love, until you've been broken. i believe the grass is greener on the other side. i believe you don't feel peoples pain until you've been burned yourself. you don't know what you've got... until it all has been lost.

A girl can't have just one favorite anything, don't you know? 

Day four

My favorite book.

I've read some really really really  good books. According to my good reads account I've read 90 of them. (that I can remember.) I honestly can't decide. My gut is telling me it's between these two. It might vary if you ask me a different day though.

Sometimes I wish my life were an 80s movie.

I wanted John Cusack holding a boombox outside of my window. I wanted to ride off on a lawnmower with Patrick Dempsey. I wanted Jake to be waiting outside of the church for ME. I wanted Judd Nelson throwing his fist into the air when he realized he had me. Instead I got a man who shares his life with me, who lends me his family, who gave me his whole heart. A man that tought me how to own at halo, (lol!) who made me have a star wars marathon, who turned me into a complete and total geek. A man that is perfect for me, my soul mate, someone who I will never have to doubt. My life is so much better because of him. Sorry I've been leaving you guys with just the 30 day challenge stuff, I promise not to make you guys live on that for the next month. I just didn't trust myself to write a blog two days ago that wasn't ugly, and one yesterday that wasn't telling things I'm not allowed to tell yet. :) I'll explain soon. Not allowed to yet though. Today was fun, Jeffrey my mom and I made two mosaics. The first was a memory stone for vegas. R.I.P baby! She was our old dog. She passed on in the middle of my senior year. The second was a piece for Jeffrey's mom for mother's day. It was really fun. I love getting crafty. I'm not very good at it unless I do it with my mom. I'll never be as creative as her. :( I wish that I were. Nothing else to really talk about. Other than the fact that I've been so down and insecure lately. Cue the worlds smallest violin.. I don't know, I just don't feel pretty, or like I've been getting enough attention lately. From anyone but Jeffrey, I'm his whole world, I know that. I mean like my friends or our families. I sound like I'm five. I know that. Try not to judge me though. I'm just going through an emotional phase. I really have been for about a week and a half. I've been really upset that the world seems like its moving on without me. Everyone is married or having babies, some people are even graduating college. I'm... just hanging out. I mean I'm still doing school, but I'm not doing anything important or awesome.. or making anyone proud. Including myself. We're getting married in six months.. I don't think anyone is excited about that though. Anyone but us. To be fair though we aren't talking about it with his family until its closer. By then Jeffrey will be working. Have I told you guys that? No more primerica. (Thank God!) While it really was a good company, it wasn't for us. I gritted my teeth and pretended it was awesome and stood by Jeffrey, the best I could anyway, while he was sure thats what he wanted to do. But, my prayers have been answered- he is done finally! His brother is opening up his plumbing business again and Jeffrey is goign to work with him. I'm so excited. I don't care if he works at mcdonalds, I just want him to do SOMETHING. I want to be proud of him, and I will be. I can't wait for him to help take care of me. I want to be able to depend on him. I want my mom and kirk to be proud of him. I want everyone to know that we will make it. I want to start with nothing and struggle and build a life out of it. Although I don't care what he does for a living, I am so excited that hes choosing plumbing. It's in his family. They've all been plumbers! There are three companies in the family for crying out loud. He likes it. He's good at it. And lastly, its man's work. Thats a job you can hang your hat on. I feel so much better about our future knowing hes going to do that. Wow, I feel better. Awe, He fixes everything. He's at his house, I'm at mine, and we're not even talking yet, he made me feel better. I love that man. I do not however love the emotional rollercoaster I have been on for about a week and a half. I need medication. Later babies.

Day three

My favorite television program. 

Day two

My favorite movie. 

Pretty woman. Yes, I am aware it makes no sense for a movie about a man falling in love with a prostitute to be so romantic. I also can't help that it just is. Yes, I am also very aware that if you watch it backwards it's about Richard Gere transforming Julia Roberts into a hooker. I like what I like.

30 days :)

BLOG EDITION! Enjoy.

Day 1 - your favorite song
Day 2 - your favorite movie
Day 3 - your favorite television program
Day 4 - your favorite book
Day 5 - your favorite quote
Day 6 - 20 of your favorite things
Day 7 - a photo that makes you happy
Day 8 - a photo that makes you sad
Day 9 - a photo you took
Day 10 - a photo taken over 10 years ago of you
Day 11 - a photo of your recently
Day 12 - something you are OCD about 
Day 13 - a fictional book
Day 14 - a non-fictional book
Day 15 - your dream house 
Day 16 - a song that makes you cry (or nearly)
Day 17 - an art piece (drawing, picture, or other)
Day 18 - my wedding/future wedding/past wedding
Day 19 - a talent of yours 
Day 20 - a hobby of yours
Day 21 - a recipe
Day 22 - a website
Day 23 - a youtube video
Day 24 - where I live
Day 25 - your day, in great detail
Day 26 - your week, in great detail
Day 27 - my worst habit
Day 28 - whats in my handbag/purse
Day 29 - hopes,dreams and plans for the next 365 days
Day 30 - a dream for the future






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Day one:

Favorite song.

Favorite is such a relative term. Songs, such a vast subject. I'm going to have to break it into catagories. 

My favorite jamming out song:

My favorite country song: 

Tied with:

Favorite Love song:

 Favorite R&B: